“ETR” Model – Coping with the challenges that arise in the relationship

05.02.2022 - Dr. Daniela Mazor

The Rational Emotive Behavior Model is one of the most well-known techniques in Cognitive-Behavioral psychology for analyzing our thoughts, behaviors and feelings. The rationale behind this psychological approach is that our beliefs influence our feelings and behavioral responses. By identifying problematic thoughts that give a certain interpretation of a particular even, we can change our responses for the better, and thereby our entire experience.

Rational Emotive Behavior Model / E.T.R. Model relates to –

Event – a particular Activating event (= triggering circumstances)

Thought – Beliefs/thoughts that arise as a result of the event (what we said to ourselves or our interpretation of the event)

Response – Consequence/response (emotional, behavioral and physiological): what we did, what we felt and what we felt in our body as a result of our interpretation of the event

When can we use the E.T.R. model with respect to relationship challenges?

In situations where our reactions are not sufficiently clear to us or the other party, we can study the incident that was the trigger, as well as our response (emotional, behavioral and physiological). Both individuals in the relationship will try to understand what interpretation he created – that is, what are the dominant thoughts that influenced his response to a particular incident. In this way, we can also understand where there differences in the our thoughts as a couple, since for each situation there is a wide variety of interpretations. The more aware we can be about these differences, the more we can better regulate our responses and prevent an extreme response.

In the video before you, Dr. Daniella Mazor explains in depth how we can “really” cope with the challenges that arise in the relationship, by controlling our thinking and emotional behaviors, in order to manage our behavior in the best and most effective way.


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